Transitions Archives - WayMakers Devon

Life at uni – you might just be surprised!

by Anna Lewis | Dec 12, 2022 | Autistic, Communication, Transitions

Moving away from home to start university can be a daunting prospect for anyone. How refreshing to find that it has not been the monumental challenge I expected it to be.

It has now been over two months since I started university and I am pleased to say I am absolutely loving it! My first term is nearly complete and already I have made some lovely friends and am making good progress with my course.

Most helpful of all is that I am living in a

‘designated quiet block’

Living on campus

I am very lucky to be living on campus in the university accommodation and this has worked out brilliantly. My lectures and seminars are a ten-minute walk away, so I can come home in between classes to rest and enjoy some quiet. I am also only a five-minute walk from the university shop, which is very helpful if I need to buy anything and don’t have enough social energy to walk into the city.

Most helpful of all is that I am living in a ‘designated quiet block’. This means that everyone who lives in my building has requested a quiet accommodation which doesn’t involve alcohol or partying. This has been amazing as it means I can work and sleep undisturbed, and my flat mates are all very similar to me in their appreciation of a calm living space.

It could be a good idea to:

1. ask about quiet accomodation when you visit a university on an Open Day if you feel this might suit you.

2. understand more about the Disabled Students’ Allowance (DSA), which is a grant to help with any extra costs.

3. Read around. I found Disability at University: guidance and a glossary of terms really useful.

The idea of living in a flat with five other strangers was initially extremely anxiety-provoking

Living with five strangers

The idea of living in a flat with five other strangers was initially extremely anxiety-provoking. Although the university had supported me by giving me a room with an en-suite. I would still have to share a kitchen and living space with people I had never met before. Surprisingly, my flat is the most enjoyable part of being at university so far: my flatmates are some of the kindest and most considerate people I have ever known and it’s reassuring that we all experience very similar stresses. For example, we all have quite low social batteries and so spend a lot of time in our rooms rather than out, and everyone is very tidy and respectful of each other’s space and belongings.

It has also been wonderful getting to know people from different cultural backgrounds and countries and bonding over interests and hobbies. All these things have been an enormous help in transitioning from my family home to university halls.

The biggest challenge so far for me has been managing energy levels

Establishing new routines

Some things that helped me adjust to the change in lifestyle included decorating my room with familiar pictures and books early on in the moving in process and establishing my new routines to include my academic work as well as free time, time for meals and walks to stay healthy. Also, keeping in touch with the accessibility team throughout, who offer a social group every week for students with similar struggles was comforting as it established a go-to support network for whenever things got overwhelming.

Planning breaks and rest

The biggest challenge so far for me has been managing energy levels throughout the week. Learning which days I need to plan a break and a rest is important for me because I am managing many different scenarios throughout the week. Constantly meeting new people can be exciting but also exhausting, walking into a city centre can present intense sensory overwhelm, and engaging in society activities and demanding academic work can feel like a lot to balance.

Having a quiet bedroom to go back to as well as regular visits back to North Devon means I have breaks to manage it all without feeling like I’m missing out on anything.

the best thing is being able to study my interests in intense detail.

Overall, the best thing is being able to study my interests in intense detail. It is a privilege learning from some of the best academics in my subject, diving deep into my interests, and being surrounded by fellow students who share a deep appreciation for our course.

I cannot wait for next term and would encourage anyone who is thinking of going on to university to start exploring your options and available support – you might just be surprised!

Some key tips and takeaways that might be helpful:

take a break, take a step back and scan your body.
notice your social battery – do you need some time out?
think about types of social interactions e.g. size of groups, duration etc.
anticipate the upcoming day and build in some downtime to recharge.
think and ask about accomodation e.g would a quiet block suit? This student’s blog post might reassure you: https://www.bristol.ac.uk/blackwell/news/2020/autism-at-university–being-an-autistic-student.html
take time to do something you enjoy, perhaps your special interest.
from my last blog, don’t forget to recognise your strengths!
most importantly, give yourself a little time, grace and self-compassion.

I hope this was helpful.

Kit

This article was written by a past coaching client of WayMakers whom we are proud to have as a guest contributor to our site.

Visualising an independent future

by Anna Lewis | Aug 23, 2022 | Autistic, Mental Health, Neurodivergent, School & Uni, Sensory Sensitivities, Transitions

I hope that sharing my journey since completing Secondary School and Sixth Form will be helpful, especially to those, like myself, who found it hard to visualise an independent future after the struggles and stresses of school. I’m going to tell you a bit about my experience at school, taking a gap year, setting up a small business, getting a part time job, learning to drive and preparing to leave for university.

School can be extremely stressful but this doesn’t mean that the rest of life will be

Secondary School

I am 19 years old and I completed my GCSEs in 2019 and my A Levels in May 2021 at my local secondary school. The seven years I spent there were intensely stressful and anxiety-provoking for me due to the sensory struggles associated with extreme noise and large crowds, the unpredictable and disruptive behaviour of the students, the pressure focused around academic achievement and the inconsistent and uninformed support available. This made school life very overwhelming for me.

I lost confidence in myself and retreated more and more

For these reasons, I lost confidence in myself and retreated more and more from interaction outside school, which meant that when I finally completed my A Level exams, I felt much less independent and socially capable than my peers, as well as exhausted from the intensity of the academic work load. For these reasons, I decided to take a gap year to give myself time to essentially ‘catch up’ with my peers. I am now at the end of my gap year and I can say it was the best decision I could have ever made!

Gap year and rediscovering me

I started the year by giving myself some weeks in the summer to ‘recover’ from school. This meant trying to let go of the anxious ‘fight or flight’ state I had been in for so long, and exploring my creative interests and hobbies. Over this time, I was able to rediscover my personality and interests, which felt amazing after so many years of masking. By the end of the summer, I had written up a plan of everything I would like to have achieved by the end of my year. I then needed to find the independence and confidence to achieve these things and coaching was amazing in helping me do this!

Coaching at WayMakers and driving

While I was meeting weekly for my coaching with WayMakers I had started to have driving lessons. Driving was much more demanding and tiring than I had imagined and I found the one on one lesson style very intense but it was really nice to have an ongoing project to work on through the autumn and winter.

My Etsy shop grew and grew, and so did my confidence as I went through coaching

My Etsy Shop

During this time I also set up my small business, an Etsy shop selling my textile and handmade goods. This was slow to take off but really exciting once I started and the nice reviews and customer feedback gave me lots of confidence in myself and my craft. This venture was really helpful because at this stage, I didn’t feel ready for a part time or full time job, particularly because those available were based in sensory-demanding environments such as supermarkets or cafés, so having some financial independence was really rewarding.

My Etsy shop grew and grew, and so did my confidence as I went through coaching. Soon, I could live much of my life independently and felt like I would like to explore the possibility of having a part time job. I enquired at one of my favourite places, a historic house and gardens. And suddenly I was working there, interacting with the public and exploring the history of the house.

Although demanding on my energy levels, this opportunity was brilliant for my self confidence as I could work alongside people with similar interests and feel equal and valued in an adult environment. The fact that the job involved very short shifts and short breaks in between interactions meant it was much easier for me to enjoy the workplace and never felt too tiring. I have really enjoyed the months I’ve spent working here and will miss it when I leave for uni!

I didn’t think I would be able to manage living away from home in an environment of such high social demand.

Uni

I have always wanted to go to university. Although I had a confirmed place since leaving sixth form, for a long time I didn’t think I would be able to manage living away from home in an environment of such high social demand. But being at work, back in an environment with academics made me realise how much I valued this world and my subject and so I started to book accommodation, register with the accessibility team, apply for my DSA equipment and so on, and now I am really looking forward to trying uni life, comfortable knowing that if it isn’t for me, I can come back to a successful business, a lovely job and the option of pursuing my degree online.

Some key things I’ve learned this year:

School can be extremely stressful but this doesn’t mean that the rest of life will be. Many teachers will tell you that it gets a lot harder when you leave education but the reality is, for people who don’t thrive in such a pressured environment as school, life opens up and becomes a lot easier when you leave.
Taking time out to develop your independence and build some confidence is really helpful. It doesn’t mean you’re failing or falling behind, it just means you know yourself and understand you may need time and space to work out your own independence.
Seeking people who understand your disability and your strengths and struggles can open up many new possibilities. It is especially important to recognise the strengths of neurodiversity!
Support at school can sometimes feel very negative as it tends to centre around your struggles rather than your talents so talking to people who truly understand what makes you special is important.

I hope this was helpful and I look forward to sharing my experience of university!

Kit